Most annoying non-active website on the internet...

This one, mine, right here; Geocities got nothin' on this piss-poor web-design-and-continua-commenting-on-the-lack-of-posts-with-the-ne'r-fulfilled-promise-to-post-more-often...blog.

If Internets users continue to stumble upon this site for real information, I'll forget the "Assumed Truth" thing and change it to "Dead End" or "You fucked up your search," or a related title with 8-10 seconds more of thought. Oops, Google Pooped...On You.

For a second there, I forgot how to type words. There's colored blocks near my computer, and I cannot hide any longer that I've become less-refined in my choice of entertainment.

The White Stripes - Fell In Love With A Girl - Studio Canal

Big Ideas: Don't get any - 'Nude' by Radiohead

Inching the old crap down the page a bit

This is the unofficial 151st post, I guess, in almost two years of having a blog. For the two years before this fucking thing began, I despised anyone with a blog (Culture Bully aside).

It's occurred to me lately, Facebook-stalking people I used to know quite well, that I may be close to that point in other people's movie lives that I shed my innocent starry-eyed dreams in favor of security and practicality and Republicanism. There's a point you cross when you're 24-1/3 that the realization occurs, let's say, and SHIT, you really like the idea of lower taxes and higher national security and fewer icky hippy legal union laws. And you move into a house with a yard you can keep mowed, and you can get a dog that you call your kid, and when you write (when the mood rarely strikes) you write in third-person and mix your tenses. And the writing is about your "kid," or about how you used to have ridiculous dreams or the funny story about cooking the wrong type of onions for the onion salad!

If there is this point to reach, I want to know. I want to see it, and avoid it a little bit, but then double back and make sure that my proxy fly on the dung heap is killed before too much preciousness is nibbled (metaphors!). 

i stopped posting because i thought all the problems were fixed and lying was done...

did you know that there's STILL an election going on?!? and it isn't even a real election--it's a PRIMARY!

there's something to be said for the simplicity and infallibility of absolute monarchies.

the idea of another Republican office...

The only way my vote will be torn this Fall--that is, for the presidential election--is if Hillary Clinton wins the nomination and continues to act SCARY--or continues to try to scare me. Otherwise, I think I am all done thinking about the topic.

Reading CNN.com today, though, there was an article on how Mitten Rombley is hoping to be asked to be McCain's running mate. I watched a few of the Republican debates, and despite thinking McCain came off bad every time I saw him, I thought Mitten came off worse. In fact, if I had to choose two people who seemed to disagree and argue the most, it would be those two. They were practically the only two who talked towards the end--between Rudy Giulliani reminding everyone of his mayoral triumphs.

Does that even make sense--McCain/Romney 08? If the Vice President ended up killing the President, I don't think that would fix ANYTHING, partisan or not. It could be interesting if Republican semi-outsider John McCain chose the way-the-hell-out-there Ron Paul. That would make an interesting election.

Angry Angry

Why is it that when I watch any of the Democratic debates I cannot help but thinking that if Hillary (Rodham?) Clinton wins the nomination, the debates between John McCain and her will be nothing but ANGRY?

So much hostility--the mouth says vote for me, but the eyes say "death death death."

Elliott Smith at the Oscars

Radiohead - Reckoner live

hey! now i have one less political reason to have to move out of the country!

I think my favorite thing about Mitt Romney dropping out, and I suppose his campaign as a whole, is a Best Show character mispronouncing his name--thanks to another word blog thing pointing me to it.

While the Colbert/Conan/Stewart-bump for Huckabee has played itself out, maybe we're starting to see the influence of the PhillyBoyRoy-bump for Mick Rombley.

finding that one thing you were looking for, part 1

As always, I'm here to help.

This site, through its forgettable early years, has never seen significant visitor traffic. Yet Google continues to send people here, on a variety of topics I have never mentioned (aside from Claire Kellett--search for her and apparently I'm the greatest resource the internet can find). If I HAD discussed the issues on these anonymous internet searchers, we might have been able to avoid that whole "Wikipedia" thing before it became an issue.


“Neitchsze + self interest”

Are you sure you don’t mean “Nietzsche + self respect?” All kidding aside, I’m sure you just finished reading the first part of that one book which talks about all the great philosophies and such. By now you realize that searching on a specific topic with an addition sign and misspelled author’s name does not write your research paper for you. Sure, you’re on a deadline. And yes, it seems like an easy way out—fool the teacher by reading the back cover of The Antichrist and assuming some level of selfishness on the author’s part and going from there. But in the process of guessing your way through, you’ll come to a realization: faking it will never get you the grade you think you deserve (and that clauses are a shitty way to start every sentence).

I’m trying to be helpful, though, so here’s my version of your short essay (I’m using the term loosely) on “Neitchsze’s self interest.”

An oil barren he wasn’t, and as “The Neitch” stared down into his last bottle of scotch, he came to a realization—his dream of filling his coffers with the flowing gold from the ground was coming to an end. Though his eyes may have been growing teary, his heart was growing with all the life lessons he had learned in the days that preceded: never send your deaf son to a far-away city, even if he isn’t truly your son; always remember to be courteous, as the fastest way to a good business deal is with friendship; and try to smile, if only every once in awhile. And so it was with that last gulp of cheap alcohol that Friedrich Nietzsche decided to stop thinking of his own interests and look to the church for all the answers to the emptiness inside of him. The End.

On an unrelated note, has anyone seen “There Will Be Blood?” It is FANTASTIC!




“Joe Thiele costal connection”

Joe Thiele has no coastal connections. I think you’re mistaking him for Poseidon, god of the sea (and, I assume, the coast). Don’t be embarrassed—you are the only one to have made the mistake, but he’s flattered.


“Ketchup slang”

First off, just to clarify—are you sure you weren’t looking for the KETCHUP song?? That does not make more sense, but I want to hear you repeat what you were looking for—so you can hear yourself say it out loud. But since I’m here to assume that this is EXACTLY what you intended on finding, here are some helpful ketchup-related slang terms/nicknames. Obviously, some of these aren’t quite as useful as just saying “ketchup:”

Fake blood sauce
Catsup
Mr. Mustard
White-shirt Judas
Mickey D’s Sneeze
The shit that comes from tomatoes

This is a stupid thing to search for on the internet, but I’m glad I could reply in a way no common-sensed librarian could.

I'll get to the rest in a minute...

HONESTLY, who are these people who look at all the candidates--for this "presidential" thing--and say, "y'know what? fuck it, I'm a Mitt Romney type of guy/gal."

I seriously do not understand it. Maybe it's just my common sense, IDUNNO.

I think in the last 30 minutes I've figured out what I've been trying to do for 18 months

I used to post the top ways to reach this site, as shown to me as the top search criteria that end up sending people here. Now, since this site is entering its adolescent existentialist period, I figure I should try a few things out that I haven't in the past. So, since I have only a vague idea of what the fuck I'm doing (typing, right?), I'll make this site--one post at a time--what individual visitors have been searching for this whole time. And no, Eastern Iowa News watchers, this will not become a Claire Kellett fan page. I think I'm over her.

This might be somewhat inspired by The Best Show on WFMU, something I've been living without for seven-plus years (the host, Tom Scharpling, dedicated one week's episode to doing "The Best _____ Show on WFMU," covering 'advice,' 'sports talk,' 'conservative radio,' and other topics, trying to prove his show is the Best show, period).

It's like that over the next few posts, except I'm no Tom Scharpling.

I've changed things up, like those drug people on the drug shows

I had a new idea, because I feel I'm kind of trapped by my inability to finish longstanding projects:

Start a new project that seems to divert some attention from the other.

So I'm trying to tumblr, another blog site that lets you set up a blog in TEN SECONDS. With that type of efficiency, you can expect mediocrity. My intent is not to quit this site, but rather to refocus. If you want to know random shit goin' on with the ole' Joe Thiele, go to http://joethiele.tumblr.com/. If you want something better than that, go to the rest of the internet, and then come back to this site. I'll post--with pictures and words and copy and paste--on something of value, maybe.

But I do realize that this divides the Joe Thiele raindrop-in-the-ocean into incomplete halves. But maybe that's a good thing, since you weren't really reading that whole raindrop anyway.